Years before I realised I wanted a family of my own, I remember holding my niece Poppy and thinking ‘I never want you to feel alone or powerless. I never want you to feel you need to lean on alcohol, drugs or quick fixes to feel joy’ because I know, from years of experience, that it’s not the way.
I knew then (and it’s only strengthened as she and I have grown) that I want to be part of the movement to make this level of natural health and joy as simple and accessible as possible.
I am so obsessed with learning more and more each day about all the ways we can create this world I dream of and I’m so excited by all of the awakening happening in the world right now.
Perhaps by the time I become a mamma, natural health and preventative lifestyles won’t be disregarded and ignored as much and I’ll be able to watch my children grow up in a world run by love and not fear.
I hope. But I also take action everyday to be part of creating it.
Heres me, just having a little daydream about the Ultima Capitol dudes that invested over a billion dollars 💰💰💰 into our company recently to get us from 23 countries to 100 countries. Because that happened!
I get A LOT of flack for what i do and the company i chose to partner up with which is still find soooooo weird! The reality is I care a lot about feeling good and the people around me feeling good. I was gonna be sharing what this company has whether I got paid for it or not.
All those who know my story by now know that ive experienced an epic turn around in my physical and mental health in the last couple of years. People are welcome to draw their own conclusions to my motives for sharing this and thats ok, perhaps my message is just not for you and i wish you all the best 💜
Theres sooooo many studies i have read on my journey to healing that have shown the importance of having a great level of good nutrition for a healthy, working immune system. Studies also show key measures of immune system function are supported by our partner nutraceutical inside The Healthstyle Emporium.
I’ve heard plenty of sceptics and all the reasons why they don’t believe me, and I do know how you feel, I ignored looking closer for 6 freakin months 🤦🏼♀️ and I had noooooo idea what was going to happen for me once I was getting this support in me everyday. But what I did look at before attaching my name to this company was the research behind it ... and F me, its impressive, it just makes sense and it aligned with everything else I’d already learnt about the bodies healing abilities.
If you want some extra help with your health during this crazy time, then dont stay in fear, reach out! Plus, kids get free product when you do so in my mind it will always be a no brainer.
And if we arent in your country right now, stay tuned, big things are happening!
thehse.net is what im going on about :)
When I was about 8 years old I wore something similar to this to a school social. I had Mum make it for me out of my imagination and I was so excited.
From the moment I walked into the room that night, I was ridiculed. It was the first time in my life I experienced being called a slut and it wouldn’t be the last time for simply wearing something different (I didn’t even understand then what it meant and I don’t think the other kids did either)
That was one of the moments that would dull my sparkle for many many years to come.
For @bluesfestbyronbay a couple of years ago, I decided to create the same outfit and ALLOW myself to shine twenty years worth of shine that I had been suppressing. It was such an magical day!
How about we teach each other and our kids a little more about respect, support, acceptance and encouragement? That words of negativity can impact someone else’s life forever - in the same way words of encouragement can.
Never let anyone dare dull the light that shines through this form .... RISK BEING SEEN ... IN ALL OF YOR GLORY ✌🏻
Before your eyes even open you have a smile on your face. You feel the soft bed and sheets around you. Your eyes open to see the sun is shining through the windows and the sky blue.
You stretch yourself out of bed with light, excited energy. You make yourself a cup of delicious coffee and proceed to wander down to the beach. You walk along the shore with your toes in the water, the sun on your face. You stop at a point and sit and do some breathing and meditation with the morning sounds of the waves.
Once you have set your ideas and intentions for your day ahead you get up and run madly into the crystal clear water - eyes open underneath the waves you see so much natural beauty and squeeeel knowing that you are a part of it.
You wander barefoot and salty back home where you make a delicious healthy breakfast and sit down to eat feeling fresh. Then you set up your 'office' for the day.
You can work anywhere in the house but you set up at the table by the open window feeling the warm breeze on your skin. You write out your to do list and goals for the day and with a beautiful excitement, you go about your business.
You connect with so many amazing people day to day. Have incredible conversations about life and dreams and creative projects. You listen to voice messages from awesome humans from all around the world who are JUST LIKE YOU! And you feel so fulfilled by every moment of it.
You know you have mentors, advisors and an amazing community of friends and family you can turn to for anything. You have money in the bank, a home that you have made your sanctuary, you feel fit, healthy and energised pretty much all the time. Your life partner, your co-workers and community are your biggest fans, they support you and encourage you to keep learning, keep growing and expanding and becoming better everyday. They want you to experience even more than what you already have!
You have a business that is thriving & a comfort in your soul that your family will experience a new and better world than whats past - because of you.
I ALWAYS HOPED FOR A DAY LIKE TODAY - IM SO HAPPY I TOOK ACTION AND FOUND MY WAY TO IT!
Every perception you have of someone else is actually a reflection of where you are at.
Every judgemental thought. Every unconfirmed assumption you obsess over. Every time you choose avoidance. Any negative stories you tell about another. All are an opportunity to look deeper into yourself - to shed away the need to do ANY of these things - is to reveal the true goddess beneath who wants to drop the armour and rise to the light.
Lets celebrate those who do this incredibly hard work on themselves and THEN put themselves out there for a cause, to share knowledge and education. Who choose to add value to our lives when they dont have to and who do so with grace - not bringing any old undesirable behaviour to the table.
Because anyone who's IN THE ARENA will know - its a bloody rough road sometimes. The wins and the people helped make it worth continuing but there is always a journey behind the camera that needs to be acknowledged and appreciated.
Who do you know that adds incredible value to your life, through social media, real life or just who they choose to show up as everyday. Have you told them or thanked them lately?
It was 2017. It was another busy day at the Apple store, just like any other day. Only for me, since Australia and NZ announced they would not be recycling anymore (because we had to stop sending our recycling to China), I hadn’t been able to un-see every plastic water bottle and every coffee cup that passed by or was sitting on our lunch room table.
I loved working with Apple, the company is making so many amazing efforts for the environment. They also take great care of their staff and would give us cool gifts from time to time.
In the midst of that day I had a thought. We had a feedback line we could email whenever we had an idea of how to improve things in the company. I told my floor manager that I wanted to send feedback for our next staff gift to be a sustainable, reusable drink bottle or coffee cup. So that we could reduce the amount of coffee cups / plastic bottles that our staff had to use. He thought it was a great idea and let me take a break to go and write the email. I did this and then went about my day as usual.
Later that day I was called into the store leaders office. I had that weird “being called to the principles office” kinda feeling, wondering if id done something wrong haha.
Instead I was met with a smile and the news that he had received direct contact from Apple in Cupertino California about my feedback. They said they thought it was an incredible idea and it was being sent forward for approval. I was prepared that could be the last of it, not to get my hopes up but that it was incredible that it had gone that far.
Months went by, I forgot about it. But then it was almost Christmas and we received word that our Christmas gifts from the company would be a beautiful, solid, reusable drink bottle / thermos suitable for hot or cold drinks! They arrived with the advice and request to use them as much as possible to help reduce the amount of plastic and coffee cups being used.
From a thought - to an email - to solid reality in the hands of EVERY APPLE EMPLOYEE IN THE WORLD.
Did you know that even the plant based coffee cups have a plastic lining? Did you know that even if you put plastic in recycling bins they are still all heading for landfill? The more our landfills and oceans get filled with plastic the more toxins are seeping into our seafood, our soil, our water supplies. Not just killing our oceans but slowly killing us, poisoning us.
If you have a thought or idea of how to reduce plastic use, PLEASE SHARE IT! Your ideas and your voice can change things ❤️
Every time something hurts like hell...... learn something new.
Read a book
Listen to a podcast
Learn to surf ( board by @handsurfboard )
Learn to sew
Connect with an old friend
Learn to build a website
Learn to ride a scooter
Try going vegetarian
Learn how to remove plastic from your home
Try playing guitar, piano, recorder!
Learn about your body
Learn about your mind
Learn something new! Anything!
I’ve had so many heartbreaking shitty times in my life so far - but for some reason, every time I set out to learn something new. As a distraction, just to get through the moments in between work and work, to fill the spaces in my mind that would otherwise be filled with tortured thoughts begging to be numbed with booze or drugs or sex or begging for it to end.
When we self educate, we empower ourselves like crazy! So every time you find yourself in a shitty time, go learn something new! Each one, teach one. That way you’ll never be able to hate the hard times because (even if you can’t see the reason they had to happen) you created some pretty amazing reasons anyway.
What’s something new and exciting you learnt recently?
Ive noticed how much can happen in a decade and how much im capable of in just a year alone let alone 10! Going from a life with not very much to report to having to cut whole paragraphs from this blog post to not overwhelm you. So so much has happened both good and shit!. Soo much has been, and there is sooooo much to come. Im seriously intrigued! So here we go..........
Living in NZ with a good job, good friends and a partner who was depressed and drug addicted and not much of a partner tbh.
Moved to Australia for the second attempt. Got a great job but not many good friends as I was still involved in a life driven by my partner - of chasing drugs for happiness.
Started getting itchy feet to travel, had wanted to for so many years but my partner kept convincing me to wait until he had saved enough to come with me (never happened)
Ended up having to support my partner emotionally AND financially. Finally had my awakening and tried to leave that relationship which didn’t go easy. Got demoted at work due to how messy it became and was living off peanut butter toast and alcohol for a while (not so healthy babe)
Got back on my feet at work. Saved up and went to Europe for two months. First started experiencing signed of chronic health conditions. Started going out on my own to local bars and jam nights and making friends with local muso’s. Moved into a flat with some absolute gems & met some incredible women who became amazing friends.
Started singing publicly again for the first time since school. Got my own apartment. Started working as a music agent on the side. Got diagnosed with a benign tumour on my vocal cord and advised not to sing too much. Started doing yoga more and gave up excessive drinking and dairy. Shrunk the tumour in 4 months and decided to become a yoga teacher.
Got a new apartment ON THE BEACH!!! Saved and did my yoga training in Bali! Woke the F up in Bali and made some new friends to this day. Experienced some friendships become not so good anymore. Got headhunted and hired by the biggest company in the world. Got glandular fever, broke my toe & got hospitalised with kidney failure all in my first month.
***side note: zero relationships, since the only men I interacted with were ones I pursued or who would pick me up for one reason while drunk at the bar.
Was struggling hard with chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia and IBS but no doctor was telling me this or offering much help or advise. Did some nude modelling (which became an art show and calendar) Met a really good human who taught me that I was far more special, talented and important than I realised. Danced my ass off sober at a lot of sunday sessions. Ran yoga classes at my home. Decided to leave Australia to pursue yoga and adventure on the other side of the world. Tried to live as healthy as possible while only earning peanuts.
Traveled to Bali again. Packed up and left Australia for Central America. The trip didn’t quite go as planned, I had some rather traumatic experiences (as well as some incredible ones too mind you) and I had to face off with some pretty dark and scary parts of myself. Lived in Nicaragua and Mexico teaching yoga but partying all the time (because thats what you do right??). Physically I was getting sicker and sicker so after 8 months I flew to Bali, then NZ, then felt called back to Australia to try to start over. Expressed my heart and got rejected.
Spent 6 months living with a good friend in what Ive since dubbed ‘soul bootcamp’. Diving into spirituality, sobriety, celibacy and energy work. Expressed my heart and got rejected by another. Got another beachside apartment and lived by myself for 6 months. Went to Bali again. Turned 30. Had my first thoughts of suicide. Decided to take a step back from my community to see what stayed or chased (nothing did). Started digging deep into self development and really relishing my time alone. Ran my own yoga classes.
Released a range of branded apparel that didn’t sell. Started a YouTube channel of all I was learning about human behaviour - that seemed to cause alot of people to stop talking to me. Got promoted at work but then more mistreated for it, it seemed. Was doing free coaching for a few dear friends and supporting many others through my Instagram page. Became sicker and more run down than ever. Started taking some weird fruit and vege pills which seemed to help. Got asked to be a coach within the very program that was finally helping me with all my health issues. Went to India for 2 months. Quit my job and moved to Bali to run my first retreat, spend time healing and throw myself into this new work online. Noticed ALOT of people (and close friends) unfriend, unfollow or block me.
*side note: still no relationship and no one asking me/ taking me on a date. Lots of people telling me all the things i was probably doing wrong though.... cool.
Was pretty broken down by all the backlash and change since following my intuition and my heart. Met some fun people and almost threw it all away to play it small. Decided to go all in with my business. Got my heart broken (then ripped out and stomped on a fair few times) all at the same time I was finally starting to make an impact with my business.
Used my only savings to book a retreat. Spent my days building incredible friendships online, learning to surf!! writing my book and...... trying not to give into the darkness of wanting to kill myself when I was alone with my mind and memories at night.
Ive helped over 30 people improve their healthstyles. Over 25 people make some extra money on the side of their everyday for helping others. Ive helped and inspired countless others through my posting, writing, videos and dancing!
Made some pretty incredible mates. Met sooooo many of my Instagram besties!! Finally met my business mentors when I flew to our biz conference in Australia on a last minute whim. Reconnected and found a beautiful friendship with a dear old friend who challenged me (first person to do so in a while) to step the F into my role and OWN WHO I AM and what im here to do. Ran a sold out retreat!!! (at a financial loss of about $3000 - still a win I think). Got diagnosed with a massive tumour in my uterus and was told to cancel all my travel plans and island life and return home to NZ to seek treatment - which sadly my insurance dont want to cover BUT meant i could spend Christmas with my parents for the first time in over a decade.......and here we are.
Ive felt bruised, battered and totally broken by the last 10 years. And yet I’ve also felt so many moments of immense joy and gratitude for everything that has happened. So grateful that I created a business that allows me to work anywhere. So grateful that I stuck to my guns and was true to my values and my life is constantly being guided to more of that which reflects that. So grateful for the people in my life who ARE IN IT, for themselves, for each other and using any joy they create to pay it forward.
A new decade doesn’t mean that everything's gonna be amazing from now on. There is always gonna be ups and downs, ebbs and flows. But that last 10 🤦🏼♀️ was a lot of hard, a lot of pain, a lot of loss and a lot of struggle because I ALLOWED IT TO BE.
Im committing to breaking that cycle moving forwards and helping anyone else who wants to be held accountable to do the same in theirs.
You can’t always get what you want when you want it. But I believe, for all those who strive to be brave & kind and keep going.... the universe is ALWAYS answering with one of three:
1: YES, YOU CAN HAVE THAT
2: NOT YET
3: I HAVE SOMETHING A MILLION TIMES BETTER FOR YOU DARLING
Yes we have been bruised but not broken….. some days i also dont know how i keep going...... and yet, I’m SOMEHOW we keep going right?
Im actually soooooo excited to take things to the next level and allow in a lot more joy and abundance than whats been. Its DONE baby! Own it!
At a certain point, she had spent so much time alone that many people had cautioned not to get ‘too good’ at being alone. So much so that she even started adding that to her victim story. ‘Oh god ive become so good at being on my own that im now too independent, self sufficient, too much for anyone else to see themselves with’.
This morning she rose early. The gold of the morning light was barely visible as she rode her bike down the coast. Music playing in her ears, shuffling songs of the past seeping their sounds into her present moment. Her face suddenly warm and wet with tears she blinked them away, over and over, in order to still see the road in front of her.
Arriving to a familiar place. The sound of the crashing waves, smell of incense and the ragged stairs to her safe space on the edge of the peninsular. Exhausted. When was the last time she stopped?
Theres been moments in many of the days where she’s almost lost that constant battle with the mind and just given up. This was one of those moments. “I could just sleep, just turn everything off, cancel all my calls and abandon ship for a while”.
But if she does that, what was the point in going through all that pain?
So she dragged herself to her little cafe, set up her computer and got to work. Eyes puffing and blinking through the tiredness. But with each task that was completed she felt her energy rising. Getting to spend her ‘work day’ connecting with other people and talking about magic and possibility, she realised hours later that she no longer felt tired.
A thought occurred to her to connect with a particular friend who turned out to be staying just around the corner. “Lets go to this place I know tonight for a sauna and ice bath session” she said. And so it was.
From tired and tearful to sitting in a sauna with a dear old friend, plunging into ice coldness and feeling her body come alive again. To sharing a meal with a group of new people, talking of success and dreams and the best things that happened that day. How quickly the universe can move once you decide to move for it, she thought.
Discomfort is part of the journey. Without it, how could we possibly appreciate comfort and happiness when it arrives?
And as she drove back to the house, music surrounding her once more, she was smiling softly and so blissfully calm. As she collected her (delicious vegan mint choc chip) ice cream and wandered barefoot down the paths to her cliff top room, she decided that being ‘too good’ at being alone, was totally ok with her. More than ok.
We come into this world to know who we are. To love them and to live out our life with ourselves. Others will come and dance with us on that journey. For a month, a year, ten years or more but in all those moments in-between, how could she not want to be soooooo good at being with herself?
Content and calm she closed her eyes to the sound of waves, eager to wake to another day of this life, with the love of her life - herself.
It is no one else’s responsibility to fill your cup. Not your family, not your friends, not your partner. YOU!
And yeah, you could play the victim and say that sucks! But I don’t know about you, who wants to be a victim?? As much as the victim gets attention and pitty, it’s not a sustainable energy to live in. It exhausts you, it takes from those around you and does not provide a long term happiness that we are all hoping to experience.
You wanna meet your life from WHOLENESS. You wanna meet as one with yourself. You wanna exist in the world as someone who is so deliciously whole on your own that everything and every ONE else that comes into your life is just that amazing extra thing! When half’s come together you just create co-dependancy. You create an existence where you are always being pulled back and forth between energies that want to surge forward but can easily be pulled back. So your number one priority is to fall in love with YOU!
But how good is that!?
And when wholes come together and they partner up and walk towards their own mountains……. holy crap!
Trust the process, love the teachers that show you want you do and don’t want to allow and experience. Hold space, forgiveness and unconditional love for every messy, emotional and uncertain moment along that journey that will lead you to your own wholeness. And the universe will always, and in ALL WAYS, line up the rest.